I went on kind of a casual friendly date with this one girl from a dating website who is looking for a relationship and we met the first time. However, she is the type of girl that wants to take things slow but I treated her to a coffee because it wasnt too expensive and because I wont lose too much money and worse comes to worse if it doesnt go well, spending a few bucks wont hurt and wont make me a cheapskate. I was dressed nice. I had good personality and she doesnt seem judgemental. However the thing I am worried about it is I am worried she may lose interest and find someone else!!!!! Someone else who has a higher degree or that is more her type.
So my question is what should be my next step? I really like her alot and I really want to have some kind of connection with still dating and cuddling and getting her back to my place to make out and watching some movies. Do you think next time we meet, would that be a good idea to do and should I trust her if we met and had a long conversation at Starbucks at first? Do you think she may want to spend the night if she lives about 45 minutes away from me and doesnt want to drive back? How much space should I give her? How do I know she is interested?Any advice on my next step after I had my date?
Take her to dinner.Any advice on my next step after I had my date?
never pressure her into spending the night. If that's what she wants to do she will say so. Are you looking for a girlfriend or a physical partner? There are a lot of bad things that has happened to women from internet dating so u dont want to come off too strong and she thinks your a weirdo. If she losesinterestt maybe she's not for you. Your next date should be dinner or something fun like bowling. You can get a better idea of what she's like by how and what she eats, and what she likes to do for fun.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
What Advice Would You Give Somone Who is About to Date a Guy With a Child?
I recently met this guy, he is absolutely amazing in every single way. When we met he had just got out of a relationship with his ex, who recently found out she was pregnant. I am 20 and the guy is 21 yrs. old. He is actually not sure that the child is his bc the mother cheated on him. However he is being a man and is doing everything he can for the child (who hasn't been born yet). He even wants 2 get full custody of the baby if it is his when it is born. I personally believe that this shows that he is facing his responsibilities. Although him and the ex are not together he still does what he is supposed to do and treats very nicely.
So my question is, do you think it is a bad idea for me to get involved with him? Like I said, he's really a great person, but I am wondering that if him and I get together how things are going to be. Has anyone else ever been in this situation? Is it really too much baggage?What Advice Would You Give Somone Who is About to Date a Guy With a Child?
I had this exact same situation happen to me....so much so that it's creepy to read your question.
Advice: You have to ask yourself ';are you ready to play mommy? Are you comfortable with the fact that he will need to spend lots of time with the baby's mother coordinating visits and such? Are you prepared for the possible ';baby mamma drama';? Are you secure enough to handle the fact that when the baby comes, his views about his ex may change (watching a woman give birth to his child can do that to a man). Are you ready to give up partying to sit at home and babysit w/ your bf? Are you ready to feel like the odd man out because his ex and him will now have a bond that you don't share with him?';
It's a very difficult situation. I went into it thinking that ultimately my life wouldn't need to change since I was only dating this guy. But after 8 months we decided to move in together and by the 9th month we had a baby boy in our house.
If you decide to date him (and I'm not saying you shouldn't) just know that there will be a lot of things to contend with.What Advice Would You Give Somone Who is About to Date a Guy With a Child?
You are making excuses for him. If he was responsible then he wouldn't have got the girl pregnant or even thought he did, no matter what we say you have already decided that you want him so you will learn later on when the circus happens when the baby is born or when he gets you pregnant. he wants to steal the other baby from its mother, and you know what that will make you, its new mother
Take things slow. If the child is his he will forever be connected to his ex. So there will be issues if they are not mature and ready for a child together. It will change a lot between you two because he will have an added responsibility. Dating someone with a child is not as easy as dating someone without.
So my question is, do you think it is a bad idea for me to get involved with him? Like I said, he's really a great person, but I am wondering that if him and I get together how things are going to be. Has anyone else ever been in this situation? Is it really too much baggage?What Advice Would You Give Somone Who is About to Date a Guy With a Child?
I had this exact same situation happen to me....so much so that it's creepy to read your question.
Advice: You have to ask yourself ';are you ready to play mommy? Are you comfortable with the fact that he will need to spend lots of time with the baby's mother coordinating visits and such? Are you prepared for the possible ';baby mamma drama';? Are you secure enough to handle the fact that when the baby comes, his views about his ex may change (watching a woman give birth to his child can do that to a man). Are you ready to give up partying to sit at home and babysit w/ your bf? Are you ready to feel like the odd man out because his ex and him will now have a bond that you don't share with him?';
It's a very difficult situation. I went into it thinking that ultimately my life wouldn't need to change since I was only dating this guy. But after 8 months we decided to move in together and by the 9th month we had a baby boy in our house.
If you decide to date him (and I'm not saying you shouldn't) just know that there will be a lot of things to contend with.What Advice Would You Give Somone Who is About to Date a Guy With a Child?
You are making excuses for him. If he was responsible then he wouldn't have got the girl pregnant or even thought he did, no matter what we say you have already decided that you want him so you will learn later on when the circus happens when the baby is born or when he gets you pregnant. he wants to steal the other baby from its mother, and you know what that will make you, its new mother
Take things slow. If the child is his he will forever be connected to his ex. So there will be issues if they are not mature and ready for a child together. It will change a lot between you two because he will have an added responsibility. Dating someone with a child is not as easy as dating someone without.
What is your advice for dating someone in a foreign country?
It is a great opportunity to develop your langauge skills and knowledge of diffierent cultures and beliefs. I would highly recommend living part of your life abroad.What is your advice for dating someone in a foreign country?
If your in a forgien country ..why not ? there people? right? so why not ....What is your advice for dating someone in a foreign country?
hook up with somebody somewhere Ryanair flies, or you will go broke with the airfares
Don't eat yellow snow.
if you just visit the country for a while, just watch out.. because you start off the fireplace.. most likely, you'll get burnt..if you live in the country for let say a year.. then it's fine.
If you wanna play around, it's fine - but just play around,ok? no feeling included! If you want to have a serious relationship.. then you have to befriend first.. no matter where you are..and it takes sometime..
good luck1
most that date from foreign countries are after you for what you can give them. Be careful. True love has no conditions attached. If there are conditions to dating someone from another country, chances are they are just using you for what they really want instead.
My advice would be Stay Away. It's either Money or Marriage in order to move to where ever you are, that they want
My boyfriend recently left the country for a few months to renew some paperwork. We began dating about three months before he left. To keep things alive we e-mail every day and he calls me once a week. Because we already had a good sense of who the other person was before he left it makes it a little easier, but if you have never met the person, I suggest that you try to do the same to find out more about each other. Hope this helps! I know it can be rough sometimes!
~Jeannie
If your in a forgien country ..why not ? there people? right? so why not ....What is your advice for dating someone in a foreign country?
hook up with somebody somewhere Ryanair flies, or you will go broke with the airfares
Don't eat yellow snow.
if you just visit the country for a while, just watch out.. because you start off the fireplace.. most likely, you'll get burnt..if you live in the country for let say a year.. then it's fine.
If you wanna play around, it's fine - but just play around,ok? no feeling included! If you want to have a serious relationship.. then you have to befriend first.. no matter where you are..and it takes sometime..
good luck1
most that date from foreign countries are after you for what you can give them. Be careful. True love has no conditions attached. If there are conditions to dating someone from another country, chances are they are just using you for what they really want instead.
My advice would be Stay Away. It's either Money or Marriage in order to move to where ever you are, that they want
My boyfriend recently left the country for a few months to renew some paperwork. We began dating about three months before he left. To keep things alive we e-mail every day and he calls me once a week. Because we already had a good sense of who the other person was before he left it makes it a little easier, but if you have never met the person, I suggest that you try to do the same to find out more about each other. Hope this helps! I know it can be rough sometimes!
~Jeannie
Is womens' dating advice to men a contradiction to the reality?
Women will tell men what they THINK they want, not what they RESPOND to.
This IS the basis of womens' sexuality, the inability to admit this BECAUSE they derive sexual pleasure
from putting up resistance and being overwhelmed.
Do you agree?Is womens' dating advice to men a contradiction to the reality?
For the most part this day and time, most people put on a show to entice the other person.They know fi they were straight forward telling them their good points and faults or things they think the other person may reject them for, they become actors.They tell each other what thet think the other wants to hear.This method works good for users,especially when the ';usee'; is more than willing to accept anything he/she is told.As far as sex, worry about that after youre married, if you have been honest with each other thru the ';I do's'; then its a lot of fun telling one another what turns you on.Is womens' dating advice to men a contradiction to the reality?
Ok, I misunderstood what you said.About 70% of women use their hormones and fantasy to choose a mate the smart ones use fact and reality about the man when they find him attractive to make a relationship decision.This is why all the mess.
Exactly Joseph, but it is also up to men to step up to the plate and exhibit their masculinity, before showing their softer caring side...
no, when i give advice it genuinely describes what i would want a guy to do for me (be a gentleman, etc)
I wouldn't *say* one thing and *expect* another. I wouldn't give bad advice and screw up a guy's chances at obtaining insight into a woman's line of thinking and ruining his chances with someone he might really care about.
That's just mean!
I agree with you that us women don't always know what we want.
I disagree, however, when you say we do it on purpose. When I say what I want in a guy, that's what I truly think I want. Just because there are different answers to a question doesn't mean that they are wrong or untruthful. Different women have different tastes. If I didn't answer your question, sorry, but it was confusing. :P
I didnt get it.
nope I disagreeeye lips
This IS the basis of womens' sexuality, the inability to admit this BECAUSE they derive sexual pleasure
from putting up resistance and being overwhelmed.
Do you agree?Is womens' dating advice to men a contradiction to the reality?
For the most part this day and time, most people put on a show to entice the other person.They know fi they were straight forward telling them their good points and faults or things they think the other person may reject them for, they become actors.They tell each other what thet think the other wants to hear.This method works good for users,especially when the ';usee'; is more than willing to accept anything he/she is told.As far as sex, worry about that after youre married, if you have been honest with each other thru the ';I do's'; then its a lot of fun telling one another what turns you on.Is womens' dating advice to men a contradiction to the reality?
Ok, I misunderstood what you said.About 70% of women use their hormones and fantasy to choose a mate the smart ones use fact and reality about the man when they find him attractive to make a relationship decision.This is why all the mess.
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Exactly Joseph, but it is also up to men to step up to the plate and exhibit their masculinity, before showing their softer caring side...
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no, when i give advice it genuinely describes what i would want a guy to do for me (be a gentleman, etc)
I wouldn't *say* one thing and *expect* another. I wouldn't give bad advice and screw up a guy's chances at obtaining insight into a woman's line of thinking and ruining his chances with someone he might really care about.
That's just mean!
I agree with you that us women don't always know what we want.
I disagree, however, when you say we do it on purpose. When I say what I want in a guy, that's what I truly think I want. Just because there are different answers to a question doesn't mean that they are wrong or untruthful. Different women have different tastes. If I didn't answer your question, sorry, but it was confusing. :P
I didnt get it.
nope I disagree
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Did my first date go well? PLEASE HELP?!? EVERYONE ANSWER!!! I need advice!!??
I think that it was very simple. It was more of hanging out. I went over to her house, and we watched a movie in her basement, and KINDA snuggled, there was SOME touching, she was leaning on me, and briefly rested her head on my shoulder... its winter and im 14, so hey... thats the best we could do. Anyway, i really need help. it was akward, we just followed eachother around her house the first ten minutes of the 2 hour event. What should we do for the next date? I REALLY like her and she feels the same way... but shes very busy. I had to leave in two hours because she had like a lot of stuff to do, but she said she'd call when she gets back (she guessed it would be pretty late, like late in the evening).... but didnt call back that day. Was it something i did? Please give me some good tips and ill give you best answer?!!Did my first date go well? PLEASE HELP?!? EVERYONE ANSWER!!! I need advice!!??
Take a deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep breathe.
Your date went fine!
It was cute and nice and stilll innocent.
Don't worry about her calling you back.
1. She's busy.
2. Some girls like to wait a little before calling back.
What about next time you take her out to the movies?
Good Luck.Did my first date go well? PLEASE HELP?!? EVERYONE ANSWER!!! I need advice!!??
She'll call you back, don't worry! Like you said she's busy and when she got home she was probably tired and didn't have time to call you. So just sit back, relax, and everything will be ok
Dude it sounds like she likes you, no one would snuggle with someone they don't like. But don't follow her around that might weird her out you know, unless she likes needy people? But she was probably tired or maybe shes not a phone person thats why she didn't call. Talking on the phone is kind of akward for some people! Don't take it personally i dont even like to talk on the phone with some of my best friends but i'm sure shes into you so you should text her or email her! but only once you don't want to be desperate!
It sounds like it went well. How long ago was this? Do you see her at school? Can you call her? Not a lot of girls do the calling afterwards, even though she said she would.
She might be freaking out that you haven't called her!
This is her....talking to her friends.....
';Oh my GOD, he hasn't called me! Why not? Did I say something stupid? He doesn't like me? Sure I said I'd call him, but I shouldn't have to do that! He should have known that I meant HE should call me. OH MY GOD!! Why hasn't he called me? Don't boys know anything?@?!!?
Her friends...
';Boys are STUPID! They're idiots! Loser.....';
The good thing is...when you call her.... You'll be the BEST guy ever!
Where did she go? Out of town? Maybe she's still gone.
If it's been more than 3-4 days, call her. Can you leave a card/note at her house? Maybe a quick ';Been thinking about you, had a great time the other night. Let's get together again soon. I'll call you.'; Then call her.
You certainly haven't been pushy if you've waited this long, so just call her. That is the polite thing to do after a date - - - you should always call.
Take it easy kid. I think the date went find if she kind of snuggled with you and watched the movie. Like you said you are only 14 take it slow. It is cool that you could hang out with her for 2 hours. That should be enough at first. You don't want her to get uncomfortable around you because you all hang out all the time. She is cool and you will get to know her better in the long run. Try to see her like once a week at least and watch a movie go for a burger or something. Get to know her better and get to her HEART by taking interest in her and her hobbies. Girls love it when a guy makes time for their interests and makes her feel special. Take it from someone who knows. Remember you are the LIMITED COMMODITY ON THE EXCHANGE OF LOVE!!! NOT HER !!! If you take your time she will fall right into your hands. GOOD LUCK !!!!
there are3 things that could have happened here:
1.) she forgot
2.) she ';forgot'; as in just wasn't that into you but didn't want to hurt your feelings.
3.) she was tied up in something like practice, was really tired when she got home, or got her phone taken away, etc.
i think no. 2 is the least likely, because you said you guys ';snuggled'; and personally, i wouldn't have done that if i wasn't into someone. i wouldn't be to worried.
you should've kissed her man
Instead of sitting around wondering and worrying if you did something wrong, just pick up the phone and call her. Ask her if she wants to hang out again. If she says 'yeah' then you're cool.
Sounds fine to me. You know it was probably just as akward for her too, but next time do something you both enjoy, if not another movie, really try to get to know each other and it will get easier. She probably felt as though it was too late to call you and that why she didn't. Don't take it too personally. Have fun and don't rush things. Love takes time. Thats the best advice I have.
dude ur first date went great and im sure the only reason she didnt call was cuz she was busy u didnt do anything wrongg..but good luck =)
It sounds like a great first date. They get less awkward...I promise. Just think about this...she is probably feeling the same way that you are. Let her know that you thought it was a great time.
like u said..
she's busy
lol
dw she will call soon
=)
GoodLuck!
Take a deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep breathe.
Your date went fine!
It was cute and nice and stilll innocent.
Don't worry about her calling you back.
1. She's busy.
2. Some girls like to wait a little before calling back.
What about next time you take her out to the movies?
Good Luck.Did my first date go well? PLEASE HELP?!? EVERYONE ANSWER!!! I need advice!!??
She'll call you back, don't worry! Like you said she's busy and when she got home she was probably tired and didn't have time to call you. So just sit back, relax, and everything will be ok
Dude it sounds like she likes you, no one would snuggle with someone they don't like. But don't follow her around that might weird her out you know, unless she likes needy people? But she was probably tired or maybe shes not a phone person thats why she didn't call. Talking on the phone is kind of akward for some people! Don't take it personally i dont even like to talk on the phone with some of my best friends but i'm sure shes into you so you should text her or email her! but only once you don't want to be desperate!
It sounds like it went well. How long ago was this? Do you see her at school? Can you call her? Not a lot of girls do the calling afterwards, even though she said she would.
She might be freaking out that you haven't called her!
This is her....talking to her friends.....
';Oh my GOD, he hasn't called me! Why not? Did I say something stupid? He doesn't like me? Sure I said I'd call him, but I shouldn't have to do that! He should have known that I meant HE should call me. OH MY GOD!! Why hasn't he called me? Don't boys know anything?@?!!?
Her friends...
';Boys are STUPID! They're idiots! Loser.....';
The good thing is...when you call her.... You'll be the BEST guy ever!
Where did she go? Out of town? Maybe she's still gone.
If it's been more than 3-4 days, call her. Can you leave a card/note at her house? Maybe a quick ';Been thinking about you, had a great time the other night. Let's get together again soon. I'll call you.'; Then call her.
You certainly haven't been pushy if you've waited this long, so just call her. That is the polite thing to do after a date - - - you should always call.
Take it easy kid. I think the date went find if she kind of snuggled with you and watched the movie. Like you said you are only 14 take it slow. It is cool that you could hang out with her for 2 hours. That should be enough at first. You don't want her to get uncomfortable around you because you all hang out all the time. She is cool and you will get to know her better in the long run. Try to see her like once a week at least and watch a movie go for a burger or something. Get to know her better and get to her HEART by taking interest in her and her hobbies. Girls love it when a guy makes time for their interests and makes her feel special. Take it from someone who knows. Remember you are the LIMITED COMMODITY ON THE EXCHANGE OF LOVE!!! NOT HER !!! If you take your time she will fall right into your hands. GOOD LUCK !!!!
there are3 things that could have happened here:
1.) she forgot
2.) she ';forgot'; as in just wasn't that into you but didn't want to hurt your feelings.
3.) she was tied up in something like practice, was really tired when she got home, or got her phone taken away, etc.
i think no. 2 is the least likely, because you said you guys ';snuggled'; and personally, i wouldn't have done that if i wasn't into someone. i wouldn't be to worried.
you should've kissed her man
Instead of sitting around wondering and worrying if you did something wrong, just pick up the phone and call her. Ask her if she wants to hang out again. If she says 'yeah' then you're cool.
Sounds fine to me. You know it was probably just as akward for her too, but next time do something you both enjoy, if not another movie, really try to get to know each other and it will get easier. She probably felt as though it was too late to call you and that why she didn't. Don't take it too personally. Have fun and don't rush things. Love takes time. Thats the best advice I have.
dude ur first date went great and im sure the only reason she didnt call was cuz she was busy u didnt do anything wrongg..but good luck =)
It sounds like a great first date. They get less awkward...I promise. Just think about this...she is probably feeling the same way that you are. Let her know that you thought it was a great time.
like u said..
she's busy
lol
dw she will call soon
=)
GoodLuck!
Advice Please. My recent ex is trying to hangout/date a ';friend';?
Me and this guy dated for around 9 months. We started having problems and i was losing feelings for him. I broke up with him and it's been about a month. Well i recently found out that he is trying to get with one of my so called ';friends'; and it hurts more than anything.(We are not good friends, but we do hangout occationally) I can't stand to know that he is with someone else when i have no one. We talked last night and i just don't want to date him, in our previous relationship he tried to control my life and i just can't do that. Now i feel like if they start dating then she will feel like she is superior to me, and that drives me insane!
Any advice on what i should do and how i can prevent feeling like this?Advice Please. My recent ex is trying to hangout/date a ';friend';?
My mom always calls this ';Dirty Pool';. You have to get rid of both of them now.
As far as your feelings. That's another ';hate to tell you, but'; Yeah sorry sister. Your gonna burn on this one for awhile.
In about 2 months though you'll hardly feel a thing and you'll have learned a great lesson. You learn what to look out for with each love that crashes.Advice Please. My recent ex is trying to hangout/date a ';friend';?
He's the controlling one?
if you aren't ready, then say so.
i'm not ready to be friends yet.
Any advice on what i should do and how i can prevent feeling like this?Advice Please. My recent ex is trying to hangout/date a ';friend';?
My mom always calls this ';Dirty Pool';. You have to get rid of both of them now.
As far as your feelings. That's another ';hate to tell you, but'; Yeah sorry sister. Your gonna burn on this one for awhile.
In about 2 months though you'll hardly feel a thing and you'll have learned a great lesson. You learn what to look out for with each love that crashes.Advice Please. My recent ex is trying to hangout/date a ';friend';?
He's the controlling one?
if you aren't ready, then say so.
i'm not ready to be friends yet.
I haven't been on a date in like a kajillion years...so now it's time.any advice for this recovering househag?
No, don't listen to that poor advice from Bella, then you will continue to not get dates. Put on a short skirt and high heals everywhere you go.
Make the first move. Guys don't like ambiguity. Some are just chicken, but they might still be ok. Some just might be thinking of cars or motorcycles and need you to capture their attention.
Work the sashey. Hang out where real single men go, like autoparts stores, car shows, hardware stores, supermarkets, laundrymats, etc.
Only single men are in laundrymats and supermarkets.
Hey, ';the internet is stupid';, the girl is trying to get a date after a kajillion years. Last I checked, once a girl hits 40 years, she's pretty much gettin' a little shrivelly. Guys tend to avoid shrivelly. However, they can look beyond a few years and a few pounds if they can get their laundry and food done. The message here is, the nastier you get on the outside, the nicer you have to get on the inside. For guys, it is similar, but a little different. The older and nastier we get, the nicer we have to be and the more money we need to make. I didn't make the rules. It's just the way it goes.
Anyone who believes something else will be lonely or a freak of nature.I haven't been on a date in like a kajillion years...so now it's time.any advice for this recovering househag?
Treat yourself to a make-up and hair session at a good salon or spa. Go to some dept. stores and see what's on the mannequins. Don't be afraid to try on something very different from what you usually wear. This is going to be a new you.
Now, go to places where men go. Investment meetings and classes, join a ski club, or take a course in wine tasting. Volunteer for Habitat for Humanity and make new friends. You never know who will introduce you to someone. And tell your friends that you are looking. Maybe they know someone perfect for you.I haven't been on a date in like a kajillion years...so now it's time.any advice for this recovering househag?
';Only single men are in laundrymats and supermarkets';
Don't date a guy who thinks once he marries you, that you will do all his laundry and shopping for him.
have fun...relax..be yourself. and don't hunt. you let them do the hunting!
oh...and read He's Just Not That Into You. it helps to spot the idiots and let them go immediately. why waste another minute on a jerk?
Make the first move. Guys don't like ambiguity. Some are just chicken, but they might still be ok. Some just might be thinking of cars or motorcycles and need you to capture their attention.
Work the sashey. Hang out where real single men go, like autoparts stores, car shows, hardware stores, supermarkets, laundrymats, etc.
Only single men are in laundrymats and supermarkets.
Hey, ';the internet is stupid';, the girl is trying to get a date after a kajillion years. Last I checked, once a girl hits 40 years, she's pretty much gettin' a little shrivelly. Guys tend to avoid shrivelly. However, they can look beyond a few years and a few pounds if they can get their laundry and food done. The message here is, the nastier you get on the outside, the nicer you have to get on the inside. For guys, it is similar, but a little different. The older and nastier we get, the nicer we have to be and the more money we need to make. I didn't make the rules. It's just the way it goes.
Anyone who believes something else will be lonely or a freak of nature.I haven't been on a date in like a kajillion years...so now it's time.any advice for this recovering househag?
Treat yourself to a make-up and hair session at a good salon or spa. Go to some dept. stores and see what's on the mannequins. Don't be afraid to try on something very different from what you usually wear. This is going to be a new you.
Now, go to places where men go. Investment meetings and classes, join a ski club, or take a course in wine tasting. Volunteer for Habitat for Humanity and make new friends. You never know who will introduce you to someone. And tell your friends that you are looking. Maybe they know someone perfect for you.I haven't been on a date in like a kajillion years...so now it's time.any advice for this recovering househag?
';Only single men are in laundrymats and supermarkets';
Don't date a guy who thinks once he marries you, that you will do all his laundry and shopping for him.
have fun...relax..be yourself. and don't hunt. you let them do the hunting!
oh...and read He's Just Not That Into You. it helps to spot the idiots and let them go immediately. why waste another minute on a jerk?
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