Thinking about dating a woman with 4 children - advice?

She is a great woman - but I've never dated a woman with children before.





What would I be getting myself into?Thinking about dating a woman with 4 children - advice?
I've had a lot of experience with this, both as the ';dater';, and as one of the kids. I won't go to crazy, but here's a few tips that should help:





1. Don't meet the kids until the two of you have been together for a good 2-3 months and everything's going well. It's tough for kids to see men come in and out of their life, and really, the kids are 1,000% more important than a potential relationship, so definitely respect that space...for a little while, anyway.





2. Understand before dating her that you'll always be secondary to the kids. For some people, this isn't what they're looking. For others, they fall in love with the kids and love being secondary to their needs. Make sure you're ok with the idea of it before going too far, and definitely before meeting the kids.





3. Ask her about her kids. What do they like to do? Who do they spend their time with? What are their friends like? Are they into sports? Do they like to swim? Do they get along well together? Ask anything you can for two reasons: a) if and when you do finally meet them, you can make an excellent impression by showing interest in whatever it is that they're interested in, and b) mother's love it when you show interest in the thing they love most. Heck, everyone enjoys it when someone sits down and wants to discuss whatever it is that interests them most in life.





4. If you're serious, go for it, and have fun together. If you're just looking for a good time, and you're not sure whether or not you're willing to tie yourself up in a relationship, be very frank with her. Most women have emotions to lose if you decide to leave them. A mother of four has five sets of emotions to worry about. Just be careful.





That said, have fun! Love is supposed to be fun, exciting, and interesting. Be coherent of the kids and your effect on them, but don't hesitate to fall in love like a 16 year old and enjoy each other.





Good luck my friend! ;)Thinking about dating a woman with 4 children - advice?
How do you like being a father? Moreso, how do you like being a father to someone else's children when you wont really be their father?





If you're not willing to be the father or if you have any apprehension about being their father, it wouldn't be fair of you to interject yourself between them and their mother. It's hard enough on them already, the last thing they'd need is another man coming in and taking their mother away (time she spends with you is time she doesn't spend with them).





Even though they're not your children, you have to be wiling to put their needs ahead of yours (because they're just children). Do you really think you can do that?





That's why there's so much advice out there that telling single parents to wait until their children are 18 and/or moved out before they start dating again.
Dude no offense but i think it's a little more than most people could handle.I mean if you dont mind being a father figure to them fine but my advice would be to date someone single with no kids or at least 1 kid.What if you want kids someday? Unless you dont mind being a father to like 6 kids which would make most guys head explode,But if you are willing to try at least i would say go for it but you really should think it over and understand what you are getting into before actually making the BIG MOVE.To each their own and it's obvious you are going to make up your mind regardless of the opinions here.I wonder where the father is at OR fathers i dont have enough info to comment on it further.Anyway good luck on making your decision and i hope you make the right one for yourself because everything you do in life reflects on who you become.I am just letting you know once again you will be into a lot of drama by doing this,but do whatever makes you happy,end of story.
Like the others on the list, i say don't do it. I'm guessing shes older, and at a point in her life where she wants to settle down, and has her life figured out. And even if you do date her, know that the children are going to come in between you guys ALL the time, at many times altering your plans and dates. The kids are understandably, going to be her first priority, and as someone who doesn't have kids, this will frustrate you to no end.








So, unless you're ready for a real commitment, and looking to eventually settle down, I say steer clear of this lady.
A. her children might reject you, so you will have to get deal with that.


B. The kids may not be used to having a father figure, so there might be a huge discipline problem


C. If you decided to have children with her, the other kids may feel jealousy, even rebel depending on the age.


D. Think this through carefully first. Are you serious about this? Seeing their mother in and out of relationships can have a negative effect on them.





These are only a few of the things I can think about, but I am sure there are more. Remember, getting married to anyone (or dating), at any age, whether it be your first or second marriage is always hard. In this situation however, there will be four other people to deal with. I'm not trying to discourage you but to get you to seriously consider things. Personally,I think that if you plan on marring her one day you should go see a therapist. Therapists aren't only for crazy people. I know you just said dating, but sometimes dating can lead to marriage.
Don't do it if you don't like kids, because she will ALWAYS choose her kids over you. Always. There's no ';It's either me or them';. She'll choose her kids every time. Are you good with kids? Do you like them? If so then go ahead. But if you view them as an obstacle don't even try to be with her, cuz they're never going away.
see the hills over there....run to them.....haha j/k, depends, wheres the dad, whats his involvement, is there any point dating someone who wont want more children if you want some, ask yourself that i mean if shea great woman tahtn its all worth it int he end of the day.
How many kids do you have? You never know why things come your way, everything happens for a reason. As long has you have an open communication and a lot of trust and love everything should be fine. I am dating a man with 5 kids and everything is fine
there's nothing wrong with a female that has children or a child i have one ,but it should be interesting depending on how you take kids
You would be getting yourself into a father figure situation. If you like kids and can accept being a step father, then date her.
lol.not is like hell
my advice dont do it